Best Bidets

Remember when everyone was scrambling to buy as much toilet paper as they could possibly carry out of some sort of naïve hope that it would save them from a highly contagious airborne pandemic? Hard as it might be to remember many months later, it happened. It’s amazing how insane people went over something as simple as good old-fashioned TP.

If you lived through that difficult time, then you likely know the pain of fearing that you’ll run out of toilet paper and then be stuck in a nightmare scenario of frantically rummaging through your home for some sort of quick-fix alternative. Wouldn’t it be nice to no longer be a slave to TP? Wouldn’t it be nice to have a new solution that will making wrapping up toilet time a little more pleasant? Well then, dear reader, you need a bidet.

That’s right, a bidet. The perpetual punchline of class-centric comedies. A magical addition to your toilet that will ensure you leave the bathroom with a sparkling posterior without a single tree sacrificed in the process. Doesn’t that sound nice? Don’t you deserve it? Well, good news! Bidets have never been more accessible or affordable. In fact, they don’t even need to be a second seat in your bathroom anymore. Now a bidet can be an easy addition to any toilet and offer an amazing improvement to any life.

If you’ve been dreaming about bringing a beautiful bidet into your life, but had no idea how to make that dream a reality, then you’ve come to the right place. Below, you’ll find a list of what our experts consider to be the finest bidets on the market (all of which can be shipped to your home!). Below that you’ll find a definitive shopping guide outlining what to look for in a home bidet. By the end of reading this article, you’ll be fully prepared to bring home the bidet that your backside deserves. Get ready to sit on your thrown in luxury!

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Rank	Product
#1	Best Overall Bidet — Luxe Bidet Neo 120 check price
#2	Best Mechanical Bidet — Greenco Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat check price
#3	Best Luxurious Bidet — BioBidet Bliss BB2000 check price
#4	Coolest Bidet — TUSHY Classic Bidet Toilet Attachment check price

Best Bidets

Best Overall Bidet: Luxe Bidet Neo 120

For the uninitiated, there are an intimidating number of bidets out there. It may seem like a niche item to you, but the truth of the matter is that bidets are big business that are available in practically every form. However, they are also quite complex pieces of equipment that can be difficult for bidet virgins to wrap their heads around. That’s why our top pick is the Luxe Bide Neo 120. This triumphant toilet attachment offers a top tier bidet experience at a reasonable price and in an approachable manner.

It’s easy to install, clamping onto your bathroom throne within a matter of minutes (all necessary tools and pieces are included!). But once it’s installed, you’ll get a thorough a customizable cleaning experience that’ll leave your bottom half cleaner than your top half. Are there more advanced bidets available? Sure, but for up to ten times the price of this beautiful machine that’ll change your private bathroom time for the better and forever.

Pros

• Easy-to-install.
• Customizable water-flow.
• Hygienically designed for minimal cleaning.

Cons

• Limited functionality compared to more expensive options.

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Best Mechanical Bidet: Greenco Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat

Some people don’t like having an electric bidet because they don’t love the idea of combining an electric machine with a big bowl of water. Fair enough. For them, there are mechanical bidets that will use the temperature control and water pressure of your home plumbing to ensure that your biological plumbing is fresh and clean after every trip to the bowl. Installing the Greenco Mechanical Bidet Toilet Seat will be difficult and might even require the assistance of a professional plumber. However, once it’s in place you can expect to have a powerful and sanitary bidet experience that’ll keep the darkest corners of your body sparkling clean even during a power outage.

Pros

• Uses the water pressure and temperature control of your home plumbing.
• Offers a customizable water-flow for a personalized bidet experience.

Cons

• Expensive
• Difficult to install.

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Best Luxurious Bidet: BioBidet Bliss BB2000

If money is no object and you are looking for the most lavish and luxurious bidet experience available, then The BioBidet Bliss BB200 is the choice for you. This seat will offer your backside such an exquisite cleaning experience that you’ll never even consider sitting on a conventional toilet again. Everything that one could expect from a typical bidet makes an appearance along with new innovations in bidet technology that will change the way you think of pooping forever!

The three-in-one stainless steel nozzle takes bidet cleaning to new levels of luxury. Not only is front and back cleaning available for female users, but this nozzle offers a unique and patented “vortex” clean involving water pulsation and extracting/retracting nozzle that will clean areas of your nether regions that have never even been touched before. The system even comes with a handheld remote so that you can customize your cleaning experience in real time, ensuring that you get into every nook and cranny necessary.

There’s even a warm air dry system and deodorizer to ensure that you rise from the seat fully prepared to face the day with a level of freshness that you never even dared to dream possible. This isn’t just a bidet. It’s luxury bathroom experience that will change your life. Oh sure, you’ll have to pay a pretty penny for the experience. But once you experience how thoroughly cleaned out you’ll feel after a solid sit on the BioBidet Bliss, you’ll want to tip the manufacturers.

Pros

• Offers a stunningly through clean unlike any other bidet on the market.
• A wireless remote offers a customizable clean in real time.
• Three-in-one cleaning nozzle reaches areas that you never even dreamed possible
• A built in night light ensures that even late night bathroom trips will run smoothly.

Cons

• Expensive

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Coolest Bidet: TUSHY Classic Bidet Toilet Attachment

Finally, perhaps you’re not looking for a bidet that’s tricky to install and transforms your toilet into a complicated device that will intimidate your guests. If that’s the case, they you may want a portable bidet. A handy little electronic device that will guarantee you get to experience that thorough and satisfying bidet clean even when you’re on the road. The TUSHY is a trustworthy little device that will fit into your pocket, but features an extendable nozzle that will fire a steady stream of water wherever you need it. The nozzle can extend to angles of up to 180 degrees, ensuring that you’ll be able to reach all those tricky areas that need a blast of water after your toilet time.

The TUSHY bidet gives you a high-end feel without compromising quality or the price tag.

Pros

• Sleek design
• Easy to hook up to water
• Saves you money

Cons

• adjustable mounting brackets a bit hard to install

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Things To Look Out For

Here are some things to consider when choosing which bidet is right for you.

Price

Just like anything else, bidets can vary in price. However, it is a bit more dramatic with this particular product. Depending on your needs, you could bring home a bidet for as little as $10 or as much as $25,000. It all depends on what you’re looking for in a bidet and how you intend to use it.

Style

While we all have a specific image of a bidet in our minds, these magical cleaning devices are actually available in a wide variety of forms. The traditional self-standing porcelain bidet is not longer the only option, opening up the bidet market to those who don’t have space for an entire unit. You can also get attachments, hoses, or seats for your toilet that will transform it to a bidet. There are even handheld bidets that provide a portable bidet experience everywhere. So, if you’ve been apprehensive to get into the bidet market due to some antiquated notions of what a bidet can be, it’s time to open your mind. Every deserves to enjoy the satisfying sensation and deep clean of a bidet, no matter what their station is in life.

Mechanical Versus Electric

These days, most people choose to go with a bidet that can be attached to their toilet for ease and convenience. It’s important to remember that these bidets are not “one-size-fits-all”, so you’ll want to measure to ensure that the bidet will fit your toilet. After that, there are two major types of bidet to choose from: mechanical and electric.  Mechanical bidets need to be attached to hooked up to your plumbing to use the water pressure and temperature of your home plumbing. Electric bidets, on the other hand, have their own motors that will take care of that themselves, along with other bells and whistles. The only catch is that they tend to be more expensive (however, if you factor the instillation cost from a plumber, the savings are negligible).

To Remote Or Not To Remote

You’ve got to ask yourself how much control you truly want over your bidet. Would you like just any old squirt of water to kiss your nethers, or would you like to control the precise temperature, speed, power, and frequency with which gentle splashes of water cleanse your most private of areas. In fact, some of the most high-tech bidets come with entire remotes dedicated to ensuring that your get the thorough cleaning that you deserve! Some even offering a pulsating feature that will help loosen up any difficult bowel movements, which could be a real life savour for anyone struggling to maximize their bathroom time. A particularly advanced remote will even save multiple user profiles, allowing every member of your household to customize their bidet experience to fit their needs.

How Many Nozzles

While a traditional bidet only has a single nozzle to clean a very specific area of your anatomy, there are bidets out there with two nozzles for a more thorough clean. These are specifically designed for female users and will allow them to enjoy the full benefit of a bidet without having to become a contortionist.

Dryers And Deodorant

That’s right. Bidet technology has advanced far beyond the point of mere moist cleanings. Some bidets even have a build in dryer and deodorant feature to make sure that you walk about of the bathroom feeling fresh and at your best. Bathroom technology has truly made some major leaps in recent years and it’s time to embrace this exciting new world of toilet time.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Who can use a bidet?

Simply put: anyone who poops will find that their life is improved with a bidet.

Are bidets truly sanitary?

Are they ever! You could argue that a bidet is the most sanitary possible way to clean up after a particularly hefty session on the bowl. Not only will you end up more thoroughly cleaned than with boring old TP, but most bidets even have self-cleaning nozzles to ensure that the whole system stays fresh after every use.

Won’t a bidet leave me uncomfortably wet down there?

Well yeah, if you don’t dry off. There are many ways to take care of that moisture problem. Reusable towels are available, toilet paper is always an option, and of course the finest bidets include a drying system that is just as refreshing as it is effective.

Why aren’t bidets standard in North America?

This is a fantastic question and we wish that we had an answer. They are incredibly common in Japan and across Europe (France has been enjoying bidets since the 1700s!), but for whatever reason have never been more than a novelty in North America. It’s hard to say why. Perhaps it’s due to cultural differences? Maybe North America is too uptight about their bathroom activities to embrace the bidet. It’s hard to say. But that doesn’t mean that you should feel held back by your culture. Embrace the bidet. Your butt will be forever grateful.

Do bidets offer any health benefits?

Absolutely. Traditional wiping tends to lead to smearing, residue, and chaffed cheeks. Bidets on the other hand offer a refreshing deep clean that is impossible to beat. They have even been proven to help prevent UTIs and other infections while also offering a soothing experience for anyone suffering from hemorrhoids. This isn’t just a luxury item. It’s the healthiest way to finish up a thorough toilet session.